Four aging, life-long friends and adversaries fend off the ordinary through the poetry of the profane. From potty humor to funeral home funnies, the Bastards don't just slaughter the sacred cow, they have sex with it first. It takes a real Bastard to laugh at another's suffering. But to laugh at the suffering of your closest friends, it takes something more. A Master Bastard.
The Bastards dive head first into episode 60 with a prehistoric show and tell, seaweed bacon, North Dakota guy, transgender tampons and a debate about Hamtackle's Horrible things destroys a friendship, forever and ever. All this and worse on this week's Master Bastard!
Land Ho! After a tragic accident at sea, the Bastards are the only survivors to reach a desolate desert island. How will they survive? What will they drink? What will they eat? How long until they resort to an uncomfortable no eye contact crisscross double dock? Not long at all...
The Bastards lay their beliefs on the line as they mount the bully pulpit for some precious political chicanery. They follow that fun up with Trump Trump Trump Trump Trump Trump!! They also chat about anger management, woman's soccer and the usual mish-mash of dick and fart jokes.
In an extra contentious episode, Hamtackle and Sir Chapsworth have it out in a spectacular edition of The Bastard's Court. The classiness progresses as Ramtang supplies a tale of near rape with the North Dakota Guy. Terlet enlightens the Bastards to a new world of Teen Mom music and diabetic rap. The episode concludes with sack lunch sex moves, Sensational Shit Stories and a bit o' bestiality news. Ooh, that's classy!
In this episode the Bastards get jiggy wit it... Yup... They also answer listener mail, spin tales of wifely defense and celebrate gay marriage. Things get really hot when Sir Chapsworth delivers a stunning report on the movie Paul Blart: Mall Cop. They then dig in deep with the best child actor and gold dipped genital stories. Also, a special treat! The limerick challenge has been answered.
Join the Bastards for another hunk of hot podcast action! They share safe words, pick gender transition names and discuss news stories about British masturbators, public poopers and horse fuckers. Hamtackle tops off the show with horrifying tales of Phantom Eye Syndrome and challenges the Bastards to pass judgment on the Duggar clan. Classy is as classy does.
Strap on them ear huggers and you'll hear how important the opinions of four obese, straight, white men are as the Bastards dig in deep with discussions about Caitlyn Jenner, Ellen Pao and Rachel Dolezal. They also catch up on lots of other garbage and Sir Chapsworth finally gets the closure he so desired.
Ramtang kicks it off with Tales of Borrowed Painkillers followed by a delightful shit story. Hamtackle gets all sciencey with some sort of passive audio thingy. Sir Chapsworth puts it in deep with Cavalcade of Men and Terlet is extra drunk and gives us more endings than Return of the King. Get ready to get mildly rambunctious!
Get on board the NCC-1701-DD as the Bastards beam up another out of this world episode! Terlet forces a Star Trek theme, Sir Chapsworth has a grievance for the Bastard's Court, Ramtang brings a dry, fishy treat and Hamtackle is full of rage. Listen as the pots call the kettle the N-word with some epic shaming of the obese and stupid. Don't forget the deadly wedgies, alien radio signals and sports talk! So much garbage, so little time...
It's the second half of the Bastards Episode 50 celebration! They prove their partial sanity with a psychopath test, then listen to a murderous child threaten to stab all members of her family. There is discussions about the amount of shit in hipster beards, tales of the shit spitting slasher and Ramtang tells us all about another time he... took a shit. Keeping it classy, Bastard style!!
