Recently I have been having a difficult time finding suitably cruel and horrific films to review for this series, but I am delighted that at least I can always count on the japanese to come through. Tonight I watched Shogun's Sadism, also known as The Joy of Torture 2: Oxen-Split Torturing. No matter the title, the cinematic intent is pretty clear. This movie consists of two short stories, the first of which I will discuss here. My hopes are high for a romp through the high grass of offensive asian shock cinema.

The setting is Edo in the Shogun era, when christians were being persecuted and killed in a variety of inventive ways. The film opens with a woman being boiled alive, then another hanged before being sliced in two at the waist by a katana. The plot is almost nonexistent, with a thin storyline involving a forbidden love between a traditional young man named Lori and a christian woman after their chance meeting at a riverside snake bite incident. Then the persecution of the christians is detailed in a few scenes of rape, men being burned inside a cauldron, and a man's foot being battered into pulp by a giant hammer to the point that his bones are neatly pulled from a mass of torn flesh. Classy stuff.

Predictably, the lovestruck boy is torn by his feelings for the young girl after she is discovered and subjected to awful sexual abuse, eventually made into the shogun's personal concubine after a rather crude test of her virginity. First impressions are: There is a disturbing amount of rape in this movie, and in true japanese fashion, the penetration is blurred to prevent any, you know... obscenity from tainting the frequent depictions of forcible sexual violation amid a chorus of female screams. It also seems ambiguous whether the intent of the film is to depict a shameful period of cruelty in japanese history, or just to make a lighthearted casual flick about the "good old days". You can never be sure with japanese cinema.

The troubled young concubine is ultimately made to betray the identities of her fellow christians in a desperate move to stop the torture of her younger sister, whose eyes are burned out with a red hot poker, and she is made to watch them all face the fitting end of being crucified and pierced with a long spear. Then more torture and rape. lather, rinse, repeat.

Eventually Lori becomes disillusioned with his master's horrible ways and is banished after suffering humiliation in the form of having his hair sliced off (shocking, I know), and vows to rescue his love to prevent any further abuse. He is able to intercept her from her captors during transport, granting him a night alone with her. Unfortunately they are discovered in the morning and Lori is unceremoniously cut down in a brief sword fight. But once again we see that men had it much easier than women in those times, as the christian girl is sentenced to die by having her legs torn in opposite directions by an elaborate system of pulleys and oxen. And credits roll on the first short story as we are informed that the shogun is later promoted to minister of religion. How fitting.

My final conclusions are lukewarm here, as I was turned off by the misogynistic imagery and frequent rape scenes. I counted about nine acts of rape and sexual abuse in around 40 minutes, putting it far in the running for most tasteless film yet. The special effects are decent, save the cut aways that spare the viewer from seeing the awkward transition from unmarred human flesh to tattered raw pork shots, but the real disappointment is in the final ox splitting scene. The young girl's lower torso is clearly hidden through a hole in the platform, sloppily masked by white rags as her legs are torn asunder. Not that I was hoping for any real depiction of violence. I mean, only a real sicko would seek THAT stuff out.

It's time again for me to help our readers to vicariously experience the pale, white underbelly of shock horror cinema through my desensitized eyes. Tonight I bring you the third film in the Guinea Pig series, "He Never Dies". I am starting to develop a soft spot for shitty, gory japanese flicks, and judging by the title this one promises not to disappoint.

The opening breaks from the series' norm of establishing some kind of documentary-style realism in the story, although it is presented as fact by some english speaking presenter because, you know, white people never lie. Just ask the indians. But any illusion of reality is shattered by the format which tries to make you forget that a guy filming himself in his apartment wouldn't have fades, panning shots, or angle changes.

We greet our nameless protagonist in the act of slashing his wrists with a box cutter. But what drives a man to this kind of desperation? Glad you asked. He works in some stereotypical cubicle farm circa the early 1990's, complete with overbearing and demanding boss. His coworkers shit all over him and don't socialize, setting the scene for either a suicide case or a workplace spree-killer. But first he takes the natural approach of skipping work and becoming a shut-in. Been there. Then after deciding that his colleagues have forgotten about him, he decides to kill himself. The flick then showcases its amazing special effects by showing the blade cutting deep into his wrist, lifelike blood and sinew visible through the wound, but after some tense moments... nothing happens. The bleeding stops, and our anti-hero proclaims that he must be immune to pain, jamming his fingers into the slit and digging deeper.

Now, after discovering that you are impervious to pain and death, what would you do? Become a high-priced political assassin? A movie stuntman? A cage fighter, perhaps? Not this guy. He decides to push the limits on his body's invulnerability by severing his hand at the wrist and slicing his throat. Luckily he is able to retain some basic use of his hand after duct taping it back on, and decides to reach out to one of his work contacts to get more implements to test his physical limits with, namely some gardening shears and a hatchet, which he has delivered to him in the middle of the night.

When his former work buddy shows up he wastes no time in giving a bloody exhibition show, gutting himself hara kiri style and throwing his intestines at the screaming man until his body cavity contained only a rib cage and spinal column. Strangely, the movie ends when a woman enters the apartment to find the protagonist reduced to only a wise-cracking severed head on a table, and immediately begins cleaning the gore from the room for an unexplained reason.

Ultimately this movie was a big disappointment. I have come to expect brutal and relentless violence from this series, but this sequel was far more lighthearted and tame by comparison. Gone are the dark themes of murder and torture, replaced with self-mutilation by a character that is unable to even feel the pain. And can someone please explain to the producers that I cannot maintain an erection when you keep putting wacky hijinks in the middle of the gory scenes? Damn. I had high hopes for this one.

Welcome one and all to another installment of Films For Fiends, where I, Hamtackle, review the most foul, violent, and disturbing films of all time. Tonight I bring you Guinea Pig: The Devil's Experiment by Satoru Ogura. This is a somewhat legendary film that was released in 1985, and it was rumored to be a re-enactment of a snuff film that was sent to the director. He apparently watched it before sending it to the Tokyo police, but it dominated his thoughts until he reproduced it for our viewing pleasure. It consists of very little plot and a whole lot of brutal torture, and gave rise to the term "gorno". So let's see if it's worth a violence boner.

The film is only 43 minutes long, and centers around a group of three guys who decide to carry out a horrible experiment. They will capture a random woman and torture her until she decides to accept death, then send the results to the police. Charming, I know. It is all shot very amateurish to add to it's authenticity, and begins with a clean-cut lady tied to a chair being slapped repeatedly by her captors. They dip their hands in water and coat them in salt for further brutal effect, and beat her mercilessly with a coin-filled sock. The only saving grace to the disturbing scene is that it is clearly fake, and the woman takes the beating like a champ.

I imagine this might be where most real women would check out in real life, but this tough gal endures a three man texas-style boot party followed by a thorough pinching administered by pliers without appearing very impressed. The thugs take her toughness as a challenge, but again fail to break her when they inexplicably decide to spin her in an office chair to the point of unconsciousness, then force feed her liquor. Not much of a torture if you ask me. I did this same thing to myself two weeks ago.

Moving on to psychological torture, the men play computerized static to her through headphones for twenty hours until she screams like a banshee then appears to go comatose. But still she persists. It is at this point that they ratchet up the violence, tearing out patches of her hair and peeling away her fingernails. For me it would be at this point that I request a bullet, but not her. I am starting to like this lady.

Now the men liberally apply scalding cooking oil to her tender bits, starting with the inside flesh of her arms, to sizzling effect. Cue the maggots. The foul worms are applied to her burns and go to town on the necrotic flesh, although the girl seems too out of it to properly digest the horror of the situation. Strangely, the captors then decide to giggle like retards while they throw rotting meat at their prisoner. Entertaining? Yes. Torture? No.

But then the trio begins to truly test her bounds. They cut her hands with a scalpel and batter them with a hammer in what is actually a pretty convincing special effect, and then shove a needle through the side of her head and out her retina. Talk about escalating the situation. The film ends rather abruptly with a shot of the dead woman suspended in some kind of net.

So overall, how was it? I spent most of this film wondering what all the fuss was about. The majority of the torture is rather mundane and not particularly disturbing, but the ambiance and tone of it is quite menacing and downright mean. But the gouging of the eye was definitely cringe-worthy, even for someone as desensitized as myself. Overall I felt like I was cheated out of the gruesome promises the film made on the internet, probably mostly due to the acting of the victim. I am a big fan of japanese gore films, and they are generally much more inventive and unconventional than american slasher flicks, but the stoic submissiveness of the japanese woman lends itself better to pornography than torture, I guess. At least it avoids the transparently dishonest attempt at redeeming morality that tarnishes films like Cannibal Holocaust, although it is more likely to lull a gore-hound to sleep than inspire frantic masturbation. But I understand there are like six other brutal short films in the Guinea Pig franchise, so perhaps they will still live up to my expectations, assuming I can track them down. Until then, my blood lust will be left wanting.

Cannibal Holocaust is an italian horror film directed by Ruggero Deodato that was the center of much controversy when it was released in 1980 due to it's horrifically graphic portrayal of tribal violence and sexual torture. This is one of the first films to use the "found footage" concept to add realism, and is clearly had influence on later work like The Blair Witch Project. Apparently many thought the effects to be so realistic that they believed the film to be an actual documentary, which makes no sense as it is full of shitty acting and is clearly fictional. But this did not quell the controversy, and the film was widely banned amidst rumors that some of the actors were actually murdered on film to add to it's authenticity, and the film's producer was arrested on obscenity charges.

The plot centers around a group of American filmmakers that descend into the jungles of the amazon in search of indigenous tribal people that have been segregated from modern society. They predictably don't return, and an adventurous anthropologist takes up the task of hunting them down to determine their fate. Aided by a group of paramilitary guerrillas, the doctor is led into the heart of the jungle where he witnesses savage acts being performed by the cannibals.

They first discover a female being raped with huge wooden dildo before having her vagina packed with mud and bludgeoned to death. The jungle guides explain this is "an adultery punishment ritual", which seems pretty unlikely. Another dead giveaway to the fictional nature of this film is the absence of armpit hair and the well-manicured pubic hair of the "native" women, but then again morons never let logic get in the way of a good urban legend.

As the group encounters the tribal population they dazzle them with such modern technology as switchblade knives, guns, and music from a cassette player, and are pressured to join them in feasting on the liver of a long decomposed human corpse. They are able to get in the good graces of the natives and manage to recover the film record of the lost documentarians and return to modern society where they review the footage.

The lost footage shows routine horseplay as well as a gruesome scene of the group dismembering and eating a giant live turtle. As with all of these shock horror movies from the '70s and '80s the killing of live animals (including a later scene of a monkey being decapitated) is always the most disturbing aspect of the gore, and could never be done today without widespread outrage.

Things turn south for the group after their guide is bitten by a poisonous snake, prompting the group to hastily amputate his leg, killing him. When the group first encounters the tribal people, they shoot one of them in an attempt to slow him down and follow him to the larger population, setting off a chain of events that seals their fates. The dark side of the documentarians is revealed, and they strangely decide to kill as many of the natives as possible by lighting their huts on fire. Why they do this is never quite explained, and makes no sense since they continue filming it and apparently still plan on releasing this film on their return.

The doctor that retrieved the film becomes distraught when watching it, and becomes reluctant to release the footage publicly due to the atrocities being committed, and worries that the natives will be judged harshly for their cannibalism despite being provoked to violence by the ignorant outsiders. In an effort to convince his employers to never release the film, he shows them the worst footage in which the group captures and takes turn raping a young tribal girl, then impaling her on a huge wooden pole. In another ridiculous moment, the group pretends the woman was killed by her fellow tribespeople despite having just filmed themselves raping her.

At this time the tribe descends on them, killing their cameraman with a spear and cutting off his genitals. For some inexplicable reason the survivors decide to stick around and film as he is dismembered and eaten, and somehow are not discovered just feet away in the bushes. When they try to flee the female is captured and raped (of course the cameraman again decides to remain behind to film it), and they are all beaten to death and eaten. The doctor is successful in convincing his employers to never release the footage, and the film ends with him lamenting "I wonder who the REAL cannibals are..." How poetic.

I must say that this film was comically bad. The producers ignore countless continuity errors, the acting is some of the worst I have ever seen (especially the female documentarian, who seems incapable of delivering her lines without retarded facial contortions), and they try to deny their own blatant racism in the depiction of the natives by revealing at the end that they were provoked to violence by the inhumanity of the western invaders. The real inhumanity displayed here is by the producers themselves, as they kill about a half dozen live animals (a small rodent, a pig, snake, turtle and a monkey) simply for shock value. At least most of the other films I have reviewed were good for a laugh, I spent most of the time while viewing Cannibal Holocaust just waiting for it to be over. It seems like the whole thing was just an excuse to show simulated rape. If that kind of thing is your bag, then go for it. Personally, I deleted this from my hard drive immediately after watching it, not out of shock, but out of disinterest.