I am craving for something quite filthy

A device that the devil might build me

A dong at one end

A long shaft with a bend

That when fondled spits out something milky

You should never make love to a puppet

No matter how well the maker does stuff it

Its mouth might look sweet

But every one lacks their feet

And the end with hand's where you'd fuck it

A priest is a leader of people

A guide bringing masses from evil

But some go astray

And claim they're not gay

But rape scores of young boys in the steeple

An abortion is tragic two ways

Once for the toll a mom pays

But also the waste

They're not converted to paste

And served to the starving on trays

I've got a small broken phallus

A member that's been treated with malice

It's been beaten and burned

But one thing I've learned

Is I can strike a match on the callus

Any regular reader would notice that yesterday I suffered an unprovoked attack of homophobic poetry penned by my dear colleague Terlet.  Not one to take such an offense lying down I decided to respond in kind.  So I give you this post in the spirit of mutually assured destruction, perhaps with a heightened level of homophobia and distaste.  Enjoy.

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Terlet has an inverted penis

Like a button applied by a seamstress

From ten paces you'd say

It must have rotted away

And until now it's been a secret between us

Terlet is secretly gay

His ass is on frequent display

He considers your meat

A delectable treat

And he's eager to spread for some pay

Terlet is crippled and queer

He's unhappy without feces to smear

His left leg is lame

But his asshole is game

And as a bottom his sex has no peer

Terlet thinks cocks are sublime

His mouth can take two at a time

He would never protest

A request to molest

And he'll swallow your load for a dime

Terlet submits to gay men

Nightly he services ten

He's quite proud to say

That no cock's turned away

And he keeps deepthroating until you say "when"

Terlet is fueled by cum

It's inserted by way of his bum

And when he runs low

His feet move quite slow

So he plugs up his drip with his thumb

Terlet is dying of aids

His friends watch as he steadily fades

Through gay sex it was caught

And now he's destined to rot

And his lesions are scattered in spades

Terlet has an insatiable anus

He finds the most aggressive act to be painless

But once you beat your meat

Make a hasty retreat

Because his requests for more sex are quite shameless

Terlet

I wasn't sure what to post tonight, so I made up some filthy limericks. These are originals, but certainly nothing to be proud of. Enjoy!

Her husband had passed out between us

And her nude form affected my penis

So I gave her my inches

And a few playful pinches

But he awoke with a stroke 'cause he'd seen us

My drinking was making me floppy

So the whore had to balance atop me

Some juices exuded

So I quickly concluded

Her seconds were decidedly sloppy

She explained when I inserted my thumb

That a beating would help her to cum

So I bit off her clit

And made her admit

That her vagina was actually numb

My girl lost a toy in my anus

And I insisted removal be painless

So she reached deep inside

But it continued to hide

Now my doctor is sure of my gayness