Master Bastard
green front purple back.jpg


Four aging, life-long friends and adversaries fend off the ordinary through the poetry of the profane.  From potty humor to funeral home funnies, the Bastards don't just slaughter the sacred cow, they have sex with it first.  It takes a real Bastard to laugh at another's suffering.  But to laugh at the suffering of your closest friends, it takes something more.  A Master Bastard.

Master Bastard #187 - Clean Body Full Tummy

The Bastards create and argue about their own religions.  Then it's time for limericks, He-Man, Crapmus and full body soup!  Classtard and kisses!

Master Bastard 187.jpg
Master Bastard #186 - Merry Crapmas!

Hamtackle puts his belly to use as he plays the pivotal role of Santa on our very first Crapmus.  There is also limericks, Aussie movie time and Terlet shows off his new subscription box full of dead animal parts.  Merry Classtard!

Master Bastard 186.jpg
Master Bastard #185 - All Mumble Rappers Go To Heaven

The Bastards break into a fresh bottle of that sweet, sweet Absinthe.  Did I say "sweet, sweet Absinthe"?  I meant Licorice Cancer...  They talk video games, movies, recite limericks and mourn the death of a 2018 Master Bastard Rapper Talent Tournament contestant.  Respectful Classtard.

Master Bastard 185.jpg
Master Bastard #184 - Pumpkin Pants

The Bastards wrap you in a blanket of filthy fun with limericks, more Aussie talk, show and tell and video game goodness.  This was recorded before the Elder Scrolls VI announcement because I'm lazy and  release stuff late.  Classtard.  

Master Bastard 184.jpg
Master Bastard #183 - Trash Can Toilet

The Bastards discuss celebrity suicide in a dignified and solemn manner.  If you feel you are a celebrity in crisis, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. It is a free, 24-hour hotline, at 1.800.273.TALK (8255).  Responsible Classtard.

Master Bastard 183.jpg
Master Bastard #182 - Gender Hoarding

The Bastards read creampie limericks, review Aussie cinema, freak out about crickets and play a rousing game of Name That Gender!  Classtard Classtard 1 2 3, put that Classtard inside me!!

Master Bastard 182.jpg
Master Bastard #181 - Welcome To Snowtown!

The Bastards start the foreplay with some super sexy Skype issues!  Once they got ya' drippin', it's time for a long discussion about a very upsetting movie, The Snowtown Murders.  Then they finish you off with a questionably racist beard conversation.  "I hate Drake!" Sir Chapsworth shouts as he sponges off your belly.

Master Bastard 181.jpg
Master Bastard #180 - Verbal Diarrhea

The Bastards listen to an assortment of singing styles, prayer methods, animal calls and other various mostly horrible mouth sounds.  Got em, right up the Classtard!!

Master Bastard 180.jpg
Master Bastard #179 - Is It Handsome?

The Bastards discuss the classic film Battlefield Earth.  There is also Limericks, Sports, Show & Tell and mouth breathing.  This episode is so full of Classtard you'll have to chew to swallow it all!!

Master Bastard 179.jpg
Master Bastard #178 - Kissing Men

Crickets,  cricket, typing, AFL, movie debates, music by L.Ron and trigger warning causing super hero ideas.  Viva la Classtard!

Master Bastard 178.jpg