Master Bastard
Classtard
green front purple back.jpg

PODCAST

Four aging, life-long friends and adversaries fend off the ordinary through the poetry of the profane.  From potty humor to funeral home funnies, the Bastards don't just slaughter the sacred cow, they have sex with it first.  It takes a real Bastard to laugh at another's suffering.  But to laugh at the suffering of your closest friends, it takes something more.  A Master Bastard.

Master Bastard #238 - Unemployed Eye

The Bastards are back! Where did they go? Nowhere! They fill you in on their adventures, treasures, tragedies and Sir Chapsworth makes sex noises. Classtard!

 
Master Bastard 238.jpg
 
Master Bastard #237 - Battle Gravy

The Bastards are back with another episode that Terlet took his time on editing. This episode is chock full of all the steaming filth that you’ve come to expect and adore. Lotion up your Ladybugs and get ready to get filled with podcasty goodness. Classtard!

 
Master Bastard 237.jpg
 
Master Bastard #236 - Self-Admiration Masturbation

Well well, the Bastards are back… Surprised? Confused? Titillated? Good, those are all positive feelings to associate with this podcast. Why not lay back and breath deep… just breath in… and out… in… and out. Isn’t that nice? Do you feel relaxed? Good, good. Why not take of those tight pants? Give us a gander at your slander? Give us a queef of that beef? Give us a plop of that slop? Give us a poke with that joke? Give us a choke with that stroke? Show us your genitals? No? Classtard.

 
Master Bastard 236.jpg
 
Master Bastard #235 - Ron Perlman's Upper Lip

The Bastards are back and boy are they chubby. Hamtackle finds Bruce Vilanch disgusting and I think that is his way of covering up the fact that he really reeeally wants to fuck him. There is also buckets of limericks and some good old Para-Files. Classtard!

 
Master Bastard 235.jpg
 
Master Bastard #234 - Rawdogging Prostitutes

The Bastards are back and they love to snack! Terlet briefly tests the Bastard’s ASMR waters and celebrity death is discussed, heavily. Get a grip of those Classtardy hips and give em a tush push!

 
MASTER BASTARD 234.jpg
 
Master Bastard #233 - Back In The Bucket

The Bastards are back. Isn’t that nice? Lot’s of passionate pandemic palaver is peppered with paltry penile prattle. You know, the usual. Classtard.

 
MASTER BASTARD 233.jpg
 
Master Bastard #232 - My Favorite Apocalypse

The Bastards are back! You thought/hoped we were done, but you were wrong! Do you feel stupid now? You should, you dumbass… The Bastards pick new Celebrity Death Pools and chat about their favorite potential apolcalypses… Apocalypsi? Classtard!

 
Master Bastard 232.jpg
 
Master Bastard #231 - The Erotikon

Trooper is back and he brought gifts! The Bastards chat and then play a very visual online game. Just skip the last 20 minutes unless you love Audio Gold! Classtard! Get your hot, Classtard, here!!

 
Master Bastard 231.jpg
 
Master Bastard #230 - Marvin Pansexual

The Bastards take a belated dive into the trailers from San Diego Comic Con 2019. Their rundown is constantly interrupted by argument based side quests and long kept secret revelations. I Classtard my pants.

 
Master Bastard 230.jpg
 
Master Bastard #229 - Foamy Ravioli

The Bastards talk about Bullet Head, boozing and renaissance art. Then they chatter on about the woes of Olde English 800 diarrhea. Terlet gets annoyed with the random topic shifting, shame and shouting ensues. Classtard.

 
Master Bastard 229.jpg