Quotable Cleveland - Olympics Edition

"Ping pong aint a sport" - Dangle Hills; bus driver

"What's a water polo?" - Sam; architect

"If there isn't a goalie, how do they score?" - Dick Singleterry; youth minister, on gymnastics

"Them Chinese can't ride horses" - Lance Perry; bird feeder

"Allowing a cyborg in sprinting? Everyone knows the Nexus 6 models only have a four year life span!" - Andy Samerson; Pokemon trainer

"Honestly, his entry was amazing!" - Daryl Powers; bareback gay porn actor

"He's just so strong aggressive.  They couldn't stop him, but just had to sit back and accept what he was giving them." - Random bus passenger, on Kobe Bryant

"That ain't how you make a soup!" - Theresa Briggs; provocateur, on Ryan Lochte

"I really thought their last drummer was better.  But then again, I see them every year." - Random man who thought we were discussing the Grateful Dead

"A wink and a smile will only get you so far, girlfriend!" - Unknown drunken taxi driver, criticizing women's boxing

"He should be screened for Testosteroni!" - Bernie Waddles, on Michael Phelps

"I'm waiting for the bowling finals." - Unnamed barfly beggar