Shelly "Sexty" Sanderson

So, lik evreebody I no is lik, totoley ecksited 4 dis, lik moV, D Hunger Games n junk.  All o my frenz lik, totoley red d books.  I jus cud not get tru dem.  Dey spelld wordz all weerd n big.  I ges dat iz how dey r sposed 2 tok n d fyoocher n junk.  Bt wen dey sed dey wer maken a moV 4 D Hunger Games I wuz all lik, "Waaaa?"

I jus don getit.  Y wood aneebodee wanna wach a moV bout hungree peepl?  Beeing hungree iz lik, totoley good  4 u n junk.  I totoley m lik, hungree all d tiem n my body iz lik totoley 2 hot 2 handel!  Dis moV lik, totoley lukz stoopid.

Bt I lik, wend 2 c it aneeway.  Dem peepl n d moV theetr r lik totoley azzhos.  I was like, txtn my bf n all dem peepl in d moV theetr lik totoley gotz mad at me.  Dey wer like, "turn offf yor phne bich!" n I wuz like, "FU! dis iz d usa u notsee!" 

Dey totoley made me ged out o d theetr.  I bet d moV theetr oner iz 100% a notsee.  Bt lik, heer iz my reevu nyway.  Dis like, grl namd Catnip lik iz hungree n lik her sis is like sposd 2 fite peepl 4 fud n junk.  Bt Catnip sayz shee wil fite d fud peepl.  Datz az far az i got.  Den dos notseez came in n wer lik, ruud 2 me.  So dis moV sux big tiem.  D actrs iz lik totoley f@ n dis moV 2.  So nasT.

BARF!  She iz sooo F@!

I wud h8t 2 liv n a fyoocher wer peepl r all f@ w/ fud.  dey wud look soooo nasT.  2 mch food makz u totoley f@ azd n junk.  D fyoocher is totoley gA.  I giv dis moovee a "G" 4 gA, cuz it wuz totoley gA.

Totoley Hot!

Twilit iz totoley a btr moV cuz dat grl nos how 2 not eet.  She iz totoley hot.  U can totoley C her bonz thru her closz.  Dat iz how peepl r sposed to be.  Hot n Sknnee.  N like dat vampr iz totoley skinnee hot 2 cuz drnkn blud iz totoley gud 4 u.  I wan mor Twilit moVees.