Classtard
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PODCAST

Four aging, life-long friends and adversaries fend off the ordinary through the poetry of the profane.  From potty humor to funeral home funnies, the Bastards don't just slaughter the sacred cow, they have sex with it first.  It takes a real Bastard to laugh at another's suffering.  But to laugh at the suffering of your closest friends, it takes something more.  A Master Bastard.

Posts in Comedy
Master Bastard #19 - Dream Shart

Follow the Bastards down this darkened alley to enjoy tales of trees that shit on Christians, mariachi bat-beatings, and witness Ramtang take one for the team by wounding himself trying to open imported canned meat-like product.  And the discomfort is palpable as the first chapter of the involuntary book club is discussed.

Master Bastard #18 - St. Patrick's Day Podcast Spectacular!

It’s Saint Patrick’s day, you Bastards!  A frenzied four-way free-for-all is unleashed for our favorite holiday!  There’s drinking, belching, and the perpetuation of every possible irish stereotype on this chaotic episode.  Take some time out of your day to enjoy it, or more likely- to despise it.

Master Bastard #17 - Deadly Drugs, Dried Beef and Book Clubs

This week the Bastards do some sleuthing as they discuss the case of the disappearing African penises and expose the seedy underbelly of the world’s most dangerous drugs.  All this detective work builds up an appetite, so rounds of dried beef are enjoyed by all.

Master Bastard #16 - Rebirths, Spotted Dick and Horrible Things

With the horrors of Colorado flooding behind them, the Bastards present an all-new episode of degenerate delights!  Ramtang and Hamtackle expose a world that is unfit for fatties as they discuss the disaster of cars that park too closely, and everyone washes down the shame with handfuls of spotted dick.

Master Bastard #15 - Lyons Flood Part 2

After a three month hiatus the Bastards are back to finish discussing the epic Lyons flood, and the timeliness of quitting gainful employment pre-disaster.  Hamtackle shares too much by recounting the online video documentation of auto-genital mutilation, the death of Mr. Hands, and the Dnepropetrovsk maniacs.

Master Bastard #14 - Lyons Flood Part 1

This time the elephant in the room dominates the conversation as the Bastards discuss the destruction and turmoil surrounding the flooding of their hometown.  Ramtang recounts how a survival situation forces you to devolve into pit-shitting and looting for cigarettes, and Sir Chapsworth watches children play in raw sewage.

Master Bastard #13 - Knife Fight!

Once again the Bastards are trying something new and disgusting so the listener doesn’t have to… the fabled mixed drink known as the knife fight!  And once the inhibitions are chased away by their quickened heartbeats, the discussions turns to how to properly drink on the job.

Master Bastard #12 - Sardausage

Today Terlet tries to convince the Bastards that you can’t put jous in a gravy boat, but has no problems wolfing down Vienna sausages and sardines.  And as if the flavor of cheap, processed meat products wasn’t enough punishment, the discussion turns to tales of regurgitation and Tim Tebow, two things that go together like lesions and sub-saharan prostitutes.

Master Bastard #11 - Gefilte Fish, Paraphilia, Snuff and Mom's Love

In this amazing episode the commitment to human suffering extends to the casters as they partake in the multicultural “treat” of canned gefilte fish, and emulate 19th century hobos by trying a little tobacco snuff. Listeners beware! There is a risk of priapism or undies that could drown a toddler when the Bastards explore a catalog of paraphilias and oedipal dilemmas.

Master Bastard #10 - The Perils of Food Flavored Beverages

More manchild action abounds as the Bastards try their hand at becoming shitty soda sommeliers by sampling hot wing, bacon, and ranch flavored soda.  After filling faces with the foulness they attempt to regurgitate it all back up by spinning yarns about testicle eating fish and fat chicks.